Sunday, January 25, 2004

Last night The Gates went out on the town for a high fetish dinner. It was a blast to see so many lovely ladies dressed up in shiny, skin-tight latex and curve-accentuating corsetry. Lady Madeline Claval and Mistresses Kaya and Elka were in attendance as well as most of the ladies who make up the current house. Props to our headmistress Domina Sage for treating us all -- damn, did she look hot in an all black rubber cat suit with plunging neckline!


I envision the play scene in terms of an equal energy exchange. In order for it to be a genuinely reciprocal exchange, this requires that my slave give me some of their power, trusting that I will give it back in the form of domination and control leading to their own submission. It is a two-way street. When it is lopsided, then one party may feel weakened as their energy is being leeched away. I believe, like many of my cohorts, that BDSM and fetish play can be a healing experience. This runs contrary to popular opinion, which focuses on the veneer of unhealthiness attached to the very labels we use to describe it: perversions, fetishes, torture, humiliation, degradation. Yet it is the aspect of turning these powerful forces -- which are typically channelled into the negative and destructive -- into the positive and productive. There may still be destruction, but there is also rebirth. The balance is in maintaining it as a cathartic rather than draining experience.

Following upon this idea, I see my dynamic with any particular slave to be just that: a dynamic, evolving experience. We build upon previous scenes, each one being a layer of intricacies, as we get closer to a space of pure bliss where dualities -- such as pleasure and pain, male and female, darkness and light -- blur into meaninglessness. When someone initially approaches me wanting something very special and wicked (e.g. forced bi or public exposure), they need to understand that I do not treat an unknown as I would a loyal slave. It is far better to ingratiate yourself with me first through sincere one-on-one servitude and devotion, then bring up these desires. And know that though it may take only a few moments for you to think it up in your head, it takes time and resources in the real world.