Friday, March 31, 2006

My Email

It recently came to my attention that messages to were bouncing. I switched to gmail last year but kept the same "reply to" for convenience sake. So anyways, my email has been choked full of spam and I had to go clean it all out.

For those who have been attempting to reach me to no avail, I encourage you to try again. Either or will work. Though it sometimes takes me about a week to answer, I do make an effort to reply to all serious, appropriately directed inquiries.

Have a great weekend everyone.

Thursday, March 30, 2006

I remember when I first started as a pro domme, if I took a vacation it would be such a trip to get into doing sessions again. Jumping into the "real" world after a streak of playing hard, then showing up at the dungeon with my mind still miles away, there would be serious cognitive dissonance going on in both directions.

People say that after a break, the familiar can feel fresh and exciting. Over and above that, my first day back I would be positively shocked as I engaged in the outrageous exploits which occupy my day-to-day existence at The Gates.

For years, I had only imagined of such incredibly wild and kinky fun happening behind closed doors. And here I was living the life of a dominatrix. Why watch movies when you can play out your own hot story?

After almost four years of having the time of my life, returning feels awesome in a different way. I realize now that I am completely taken. It's in my bones; it's a part of me. I miss it when I am gone and cherish it that much more when I am back -- the twisted eroticism, the camraderie with my fellow players, the delicious submission of my slaves. It really is like coming home.

Ah, the sweet smell of it all...

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

I am easing back into things since returning from my vacation abroad, enjoying being served as a Mistress once again. Travelling is lovely. Thankfully, my life at home is pretty groovy ;-) And now people are telling me that I seem chilled out from my three weeks off. It'd be nice to be able to keep this leisurely feeling. My time in Thailand was particularly impactful. I've been dreaming of spicy green curry, hotel mini bars full of Singha and iced coffee, the streets teeming with crazy sexy bar girls.

And I have a headful of ideas percolating about the ladyboys of Siam. Once I have it all sorted out I'll post my thoughts -- at first, I was mentally taking notes, composing an essay in my head, but it seemed like the more I witnessed, the less clear it all became! A whirlwind of sensory input to ponder.

Mind you, I would never want to winnow down all that I actually experienced just to make a good story. For the sake of my readers though, I will have to make rhyme and reason of it. Yet those days in Thailand exist in my memory not so much in a linear fashion, but more as a series of impressions.

I read an excellent thriller on the plane back that was like a hallucinatory version of my trip. It's called Bangkok 8 by John Burdett. Bangkok reminded me of a futuristic dystopia a la Blade Runner. Perpetually non-moving traffic jams full of cars, motorbikes and even elephants; pirated music, software and clothes crowding up the sidewalks alongside roasted beetles and barbecued meat sticks. I could go on... OK, definitely to be continued. Gotta run!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Novices, I love being the first!

Taking a break from my sweet little playground and reaching out to the wider world is always a good thing. I can lead a fairly spoiled, insular existence here in my San Francisco bay area community of party people, artists and pervs. Experiencing a parallel reality, thousands of miles away, makes me all the more grateful for what I have, while opening me up to new ways of doing and being, thereby deepening my understanding of the human condition. And yes, my trip to Asia was also a whole hell of a lot of fun!


On the subject of novices, I know that some of my peers - whom I respect greatly - would rather not deal with them. Indeed, the learning curve can be steep for would-be slaves, with many potential stumbles along the way. The dynamic of Mistress and slave, which is so familiar to a seasoned femme domme player, can be quite alien to one green to all this. And unfortunately, cluelessness in this arena may easily lead to offense. What might work in a vanilla (aka conventional) interaction with a woman often just won't do for a Mistress.

Yet I have found more and more that I enjoy my encounters with newbies. Perhaps it's their freshness which is so contagious and invigorating. And the rush of being able to truly shock and surprise the novitiate, while being the first to guide them to the heights of blissful submission. Ah yes, the joys of turning someone out! It can make me rather giddy to deprave a supplicant in some deliciously wicked fashion. To see a look in their eyes of "yes, dreams can come true" or even the nonplussed look of "yikes, what have I goten myself into?!" can be a real thrill.

I do not expect novices who serve me to know everything already, though I do appreciate when one does their homework. More important to me is the proper attitude: receptivity to my ideas, attentiveness to my commands, humble acceptance of one's lack of experience relative to me. In the beginning of one's journey of servitude, intention means more to me than purity of action. Perfection is not necessary; an appropriately deferential attitude is most important!

Monday, March 13, 2006

I am back! Tanned, relaxed and raring to go. ;-) I promise to post more soon.