Saturday, November 22, 2003

This time I'm flying down to LA and thankfully I'll be playing in a well-stocked dungeon as I'm afraid to bring certain items for fear that they'll take them away from me at airport security! Looking at the list of permitted and prohibited items, it seems my best bet is to check in my tools and toys. But they don't let you lock your luggage anymore and I know at least one kinky friend who had some of their best stuff mysteriously disappear from their baggage.


As a prodomme, I am privy to some gripping tales of shameless, twisted perversion. I admit to a prurient interest in the confessions of those who submit to me. I mean, how could I not get titillated by over-the-top encounters of domination and seduction -- when the everyday turns into the bizarre, when the tiniest speck of a thought turns into action? The cluelessness of innocence turned into unruly passion, then sordid desire. The evolution of the erotic in oneself. It's intriguing to hear how each of us comes into our kink, what seminal moments etched these proclivities into our psyche. Real-life can be so much more interesting than anything they could put out in a movie. It's uncensored, unself-conscious and beholden to no one.

Wednesday, November 19, 2003

This one is for slave Dave for all the years of service and support you have given The Gates, and for being a great slave to me. Johnson and Woody are waiting for you ;-)

I've really come to appreciate the support network I have found among the other women at The Gates. We learn and grow together, helping one another stay grounded within the whirlwind of intense energy exchanges. There is range of ages, backgrounds and experience levels -- so many interesting life stories, so many different ways of demonstrating power. The solidarity and sisterhood I feel there is very real. Now, some who follow prodommes have encouraged me to strike out on my own, ostensibly to choose who I want to see and how much I charge. I know that there is a perception that in order to be a top domina, one has to be independent of a house. I disagree. I am selective about who is allowed to see me. And I have my share of generous slaves who insist on compensating me at the rate of an independent. By staying at a house that is owned and run completely by women, I further the cause of female erotic empowerment not only for myself but for others as well. I enjoy the collective atmosphere, and the feedback I get from my colleagues is an important aspect of my personal growth. When one is literally being worshipped from day to day, it can be too easy to slip into delusions of grandeur. Community gives me a safety net so that I keep things in perspective. One day I may find it makes sense to go on my own. But it won't simply be to toot my own horn. Showing off for the boys is not as high on my list as supporting my sisters. And true confidence in my power means I don't follow silly rules about what makes a top-tier dominatrix. I know myself -- and those who serve me know as well.

Monday, November 17, 2003

I've been busy with tech stuff for my site, as well as getting ready for my LA trip. Check back in a few days for the latest. . .

Sunday, November 9, 2003

A friend pointed me out to an article by Naomi Wolf entitled The Porn Myth, in which the academician and author of "The Beauty Myth" decries the rise of easily accessible internet porn, stating that it has made men find real women unacceptably imperfect. The article focuses on how porn-watching has become all the rage for young college men, with their female counterparts feeling like they can't compete. Oh my. You see, I get so tired of so-called feminism that really is just another form of puritanicalism, protection of women's "fragility", perpetuation of female victimization. It doesn't work for me -- I see it as just as much a double standard as male chauvinism.

Wolf, who is 40, claims that her's is the last generation of women to be truly confident in their beauty and bodies because they have not had to live up to the standards of pornography. But before porn, there was Hollywood and there have always been impossibly beautiful images which the masses have tried to live up to. She mentions that women her age in the gym have natural pubic hairs, while the younger women are all shaved and trimmed like in porn. Professor Wolf, what are you doing staring at all those ladies' bushes?!? Purely for research purposes, I am sure ;-) But seriously, maybe she doesn't realize that this trend is exactly the same for men: older go natural, younger shave and trim. The porn standard goes both ways. So for every women who feels she must "degrade" herself by submitting to anal sex because she sees it in the movies, there is a man who feels pressure to be as gonzo as his favorite director. I am sure there are young women on college campuses who are porn fans too, and expecting greater feats of prowess from their lovers. And maybe there are even a few out there who get a little more twisted, finding that the real fun can come from turning the tables and slut training their men. Mmmmm....... The future of sex -- where will it take you?

Thursday, November 6, 2003

I've been writing some reviews for QSM's catalog. It's been fun to read a different book of smut each week :-) I may look into reviewing some of the videos too, as I see some of my friends are in a few. Not all are my cup of tea, but there's definitely something for everyone!

Sunday, November 2, 2003

I was born on the day of the dead, but I am very much alive! I cannot bottle the magical fire which burns inside of me. Perhaps one day it will fade like a distant memory. What I can do is cherish it, revel in it, and preserve the markings of its presence.