Change of Schedule: I will be at The Gates on Monday November 1st from 3pm to 9pm. Happy Halloween!

Occasionally, a man states his desire to serve me as the receptive partner (i.e. strap-on worship and other aspects of slut training), and feels the need to declare to me that he is "not gay." I can't help but find this statement amusing. For one, it implies the need to defend oneself against the accusation of homosexuality. From my experience, it seems clear that the vast majority of men who see me are straight. Yet I for one find rigid labels of sexual orientation to be quite limiting and narrow-minded. They can never fully describe the fluidity which exists between categories.

When I think about the fact that most people's first sexual experience was playing with themselves, it makes me see the whole idea of sexual orientation in a different light. Most of us first learned to love ourselves, to achieve sexual satisfaction manipulating our own parts. It feels natural and good to touch oneself. So in a way that makes most everyone a participant in homoeroticism.

I also do not ascribe phallic representations solely to the realm of men. For instance, I take great pleasure in having those who submit to be my sluts first prove their devotion and submission through oral worship of my strap-on -- not because I am trying to push one into gayness, but because this charged act is such a highly symbolic power play. One that is both an erotic surrender and a broadening of one's sexual perspective.

Though I do not believe, as I've heard some say, that men who desire to be receptively stimulated are "in denial" about their orientation. If being the bottom for receptive play equals being gay, then wouldn't that make virtually all women lesbians? Obviously, this is not the case.

That we are each born with the physical parts necessary to be receptive is a wonderful thing. Really, a leveling of the playing field which is underutilized by most men. And with the simplest technology, anyone can be the insertive partner -- a fact which is underutilized by many women. It may sound a bit silly, but imagine if every woman knew how to use and have fun with a strap-on. And every man experienced taking it as well as giving sexually. Perhaps there'd be less talk of men being from one planet and women being from another.

Speaking of strap-ons, I remember being at a play party a while ago. It was a fairly vanilla event, so I had been wielding my strap-on on some sexy young ladies who were game to spice things up. One in particular was intrigued by this device, the likes of which she had apparently never seen or even imagined before. She laughed nervously about it, trading jabs with me as I dared her to try it on. She reminded me of of me not so long ago, when I was barely past virginity but ready to call anyone's bluff, with more than enough bravado to make up for lack of experience. Impulsively, she grabbed the strap-on from me as I cast if off my body, pulling it up her brown legs and tightening it around her slender hips. The self-satisfied smirk on her face changed as she looked down and saw her "cock", the smile twisting into an expression of uncertainty, then finally to slight revulsion. "Ugh!," she exclaimed. "Oh no. I don't know if I like that," she said as she looked down at herself, transfixed. I let out a wicked laugh. I couldn't help but enjoy the moment. Planting seeds. . .




Me and My Wicked Strap-On.

Whew! Last week I was insanely busy, but in a good way. Lots of cool interactions with people, lots of learning, lots of fun! To cap it all off, I checked out the Exotic Erotic Ball. It was the 25th anniversary and I'd never been, so I decided to give it a shot. It was quite the celebration, a huge event with probably as many amateur photographers as people dressed up. Being that I'm a fairly private domme, I chose to stay covered up for the evening to avoid being photographed.

While at the VIP booth getting our tickets, I ran into Cat from Spectator magazine. She was with an entourage that included Sunset Thomas of the KitKat Ranch in Nevada. Speaking of porn stars, I later spied Tera Patrick being whisked through the main ballroom surrounded by tattooed biker guys. She's strikingly tall in person, and was wearing what looked like a latex green dress. The ladies of the PleasureZone also looked super hot in little Chinese dresses that showed off their thong-clad bottoms. All in all, it made for a fun evening. **A special note of appreciation to R for the VIP passes.**


I've been posting here and there in Max Fisch's The Hang. Here is my profile. There is a link at the bottom to view all my posts.

I do not consider the Mistress-slave dynamic to be a roleplay in the sense that we simply "pretend" at conventional role reversal. Rather, I view these roles as a true expression of the power exchange between my clients and myself, during the playing of a scene as well as in our interactions beforehand and afterwards. It is how I expect those who submit to me to treat me at all times. Now, that does not mean you need to get on your knees as soon as you see me. It's about according me a level of deference, respect and attentiveness that goes above and beyond that of a service provider.

As for roleplaying, I get a kick out of acting out creative scenarios as a starting point for a scene. Yet what I find typically happens is the scene eventually evolves out of the specific roleplay and back into the overarching Mistress-slave dynamic. For me, this is the fundamental and defining force which underlies all of my interactions with my submissives.

Another wild and wonderfully outrageous Folsom Street Fair took place a couple of weekends ago. It's definitely an "only in San Francisco" type event. An eye-opening spectacle of sexual diversity, in an atmosphere of celebration and tolerance. Over the years, it has transformed from a mostly gay leather event to a mixed, pansexual crowd that is part SM folk and part Burning Man/Carnival partygoers(But don't fret, leather daddies and their slaveboys still have the Up Your Alley street fair in Dore Alley every year.)

I especially got a kick out of the dildo ring toss, which was a real crowd pleaser. I spent the whole time walking from one end of the fair to the other -- there was so much to see and so many kinky friends to run into. JD of the Knotty Boys doing a rope suspension demonstration. The Mister/Madam S crew manning their booth. My favorite cross-dressers hanging out at Cat's Alley Bar & Grill. And of course, my fellow Gates ladies made a big splash dressed up as sassy showgirls. Sadly, I missed meeting up with them, what with all the commotion at this jam-packed fair.

I was so content simply making my way through the throng of people this year that I didn't take a single picture. Ah well. Sometimes it makes sense to just enjoy the experience directly rather than stepping out into documentary mode.

Me at Folsom Street Fair